My sister makes fun of my midwestern accent.

My nose wrinkles in disgust. "Who farted?!"

Charlie, lying on his back, grins up at me. "It was me." The room fills with adult laughter.

And just now, looking at Sister's boyfriend, the China-man: "His hair is so long, if you put your finger in there you'd lose it."

Charlie and his fraternal twin, Eddie, are five years old. They're my second cousins. And absolutely adorable.

I'm on the east coast for my four-day weekend. I flew in last night at approximately eleven o' clock, and was swiftly whisked off to the home of my dad's cousin. It was his fiftieth birthday yesterday, and even though I was just with him and my mom and Sister last week for Christmas, I thought it would be fun to surprise him.

I arrived, and Sister ran to her car to get the cake out of the trunk. I walked into the house carrying it. In this area resides Dad's aunt, uncle, five cousins, and their spouses and offspring. More than half of them were at the house, and none of them were expecting me. I walked in carrying the cake, and saw surprised faces left and right. Dad was in the living room looking at the TV, and I said, "Happy Birthday, Dad."

He ignored me, not even turning his head. I raised and eyebrow and said, "Really??"

Finally he turned to me, and just looks at me for five seconds like I was just another person. Eventually it sunk in, and his eyes widened as he said, "How the hell did you pull this off?!"

I'm so awesome sometimes.

Today I went into the city with Mom, Dad, Sister, and China-man. (Before you get all offended on his behalf, you should know that when Sister first told me about him, her exact words were, "I got me a China-man!!") We went to Madame Tussaud's wax museum (for you stalkers, that narrows down my current location to five cities; have fun guessing) and had a blast there posing with the different figurines. We ate at a sandwich shop, let Dad and Sister run amok with their cameras for a few minutes, and then headed back to my great-aunt's house.

That's when the twins walked in. Dropped off by their mother, another of the five cousins, for the night, it was the first time I'd seen them in a few years. They were initially shy, not being familiar with myself and China-man, but he and I wore them down quick. The twins dragged me downstairs to play, and heard someone ask behind me, "Why do kids love Davi??" Mom answered, "Because she treats them as equals." Well, I do. I limit the baby talk to actual babies. Once they're walking and talking, I cut that shit out.

And so hear I sit, listening to Charlie ask if anyone pooped. "No, I did not." Eddie is following China-man around, and Charlie is curled up with Sister playing with my DS. It feels good to be in the area again.