Thursday, January 25, 2007

Mmm, popcorn and marshmallow jelly beans!!

OMG, you've never tried vomit-flavored jelly beans?!

I was in a boring briefing the last two days. I was thisclose to proving that one can and will die (or at least sink into a coma) from overexposure to Powerpoint. Death by Powerpoint, they call it.

Mom and Dad went to Seaworld yesterday with Trish and Gaby. They fed dolphins and seals, and Mom got jumped by a squirrel...

Wait, what?!?!

Ha ha...this little kid says in Spanish, "Look at the squirrel, how cute!!" And Mom and Trish say, "What squirrel??" Trish looks down to see a squirrel standing between her feet, putting it's paws on her leg and looking around all cruious-like. This squirrel was fearless. He jumped up on the fence and was looking around at everyone, and then...HE POUNCED!!

He lands on Mom's head (she had her hoodie on, luckily), and is looking around at everyone, oblivious to the chaos he is causing. It was comical, from what I am told; he was pushing the hood over Mom's face. Patricia managed to get the most awesome picture (will post when available) of the squirrel leaping off of Mom.

Ha ha.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Moron Chronicles, Part II: A Reprieve from Madness

If someone told me that the fate of the entire universe rested on me finding the [highway], that the galaxy would otherwise implode if I could not find the [highway] from [one of many named after a state] Avenue, then we would all cease to exist.


Anywho, spent the week at Esther's. Friday night was amusing and exasperating at the same time. Gaby and Lisandra wanted to take me to the mall because I had mentioned that I wanted a swimsuit. But, naturally, I got lost and it took me an hour and a half to meet them, and when I finally did they didn't give me time to change my DCUs, they said I was fine.


We walk into Champs, and as if on cue a guy says, "Be all that you can be!!"

"That's army. I'm Air Force."

"Oh. Aim High??"


Then a guy approaches me with his girlfriend, in awe, and asks, "So you're really, like, in the war and stuff??" I wanted to laugh, but he looked so honored to be standing next to me, so I said, "Kinda. I'm not a soldier, I work on computers." And he says, "Wow, you must be smart." I smiled, but I still did not laugh, I could not be so cruel. Gaby thought it would be funny to keep count of all the "compliments".

Then we went to Red Lobster where a couple bought me a drink. I was very honored, and it was touching. Lisandra whispered to me, "Damn, girl, you need to get me one of those uniforms."

The next day I was completely lazy and watched TV with Lisandra and her sister, Suli. Titi Esther came in to listen to the baby's heart with her stethoscope, but when she saw us watching the Ring 2 she got all worried and said the baby wouldn't like that. So she grabbed some holy oil (where in God's name would you get holy oil?!), and drew a cross on Lisandra's belly. Then she did the same to me!! I thought that was kinda superstitious, but I was afraid to wipe it off; I am not without my own small superstitions. Then we went to the mall and shopped and giggled and got all girly. I love getting girly, 'cause I don't have many girlfriends except for Sarah and Nicole and Chris (ha ha!!), and I don't get to do it often. She's eight months pregnant with a boy, due March 2nd, so when I get back I'm gonna have a baby to play with!! They're naming him Ivan Gabriel, for a friend of Gaby's who died. Lana is a sweetheart, and very pretty, though she thinks herself fat at the moment, which is crazy. It's called pregnancy, silly.

Let me explain the family tree real quick: Esther is my mother's sister. Her husband is Abel, and he is step-father (more like father) to her sons Juan Carlos and Gabriel. Juan Carlos is married to Lisandra's mother, an older woman, Cita (or Sita??), who has two other daughters, and a son. I remember meeting Lisandra once, years ago, and one other sister, but I don't remember which one. There's Suli and Monica, who I am told is a little wacked out, and I've never met the brother. I like Suli, she seems crazy in a good way. Gaby and Lisandra have pretty much grown up together, and they fell in love in high school. It would seem odd to some people, but they're all one big happy family, so I don't care.

Anywho...I saw my Uncle Junior Saturday, I haven't seen him in several years, since he was married to that psycho Jenny, and he brought his grandson with him. I didn't quite catch his name, the little guy told me Tubby. Eh. Anywho, he's my cousin Teresa's boy. I knew it when I saw him, he has the look of her, and he's the right age. I remember hearing about her pregnancy a few years ago. Her older sister, Gladys (never met, though she may have seen me as a baby) adopted him.

Something about my mom's side of the family: I have too many cousins to count. There are some I've never met, some I don't recall, some whose names I don't know. My grandmother had thirteen children, ten of them now living, and except for one all have married and had children and even grandchildren, and some of them have gone through more than one spouse. It's so confusing. And the majority live in PR, so I don't see them often.

Onward...Tubby is a little cutie, but very shy and quiet, I think, though the moment he laid eyes on me he decided following me around was the thing to do. And he's not tubby in any sense of the word. He's thin but healthy, tanned, and adorable. Then Juan Carlos came in that night, he's a trucker, always driving around the country. He didn't even know I was married, and this was the first time I saw him since I was sixteen. Let me tell you, BIG DIFFERENCE. He's 300 lbs and has long curly hair. I showed everyone a picture from the last time I saw him, and they all laughed. He doesn't seem to care, though, so it's all good, I guess.

Sunday was also kinda lazy, I only left the house to get groceries for my aunt. My parents started driving last night and stopped in GA, they'll be in late the morning or early this afternoon, depending on what time they set out. Yay.

I wonder...I know this blog is getting lengthy, but I can't help myself. There are times when I see a picture, an object, a plant, whatever, and something about that one thing, whether it's the colors or the outline or whatever, reminds me of a time period in my life. No specific moments of delight or despair, not solid memory, just a period of time, such as when I was a child in Delaware or a teenager in PR. For the briefest moment I am transported back to that time in my mind, and just as quickly I am back where I am in the present, and I'm left with this almost nauseous feeling of apprehension or fear. I don't know why. I delight in memories with the exception of those that cause me to shudder with remembrance, but for some reason these moments leave me feeling ill. I don't know if it's what those vague memories stand for or if it's the mental transportation, like when you're driving to visit an uncle several hours away and you get carsick.

In contrast, I'll hear a song I used to jam to in middle school or high school, one that I haven't heard in years, and I relive those carefree days before the loss of innocence (forgive me the dramatic wording), and I am happy for a short time.

And then there's those time when I smell a certain smell, and I know that scent, I have smelled it before, long ago, but I don't know when or where or how. I can't bring up the memory no matter how hard I try, I can't remember if the smell is from a person or a place. But I know it, I could never forget it, and to smell it again drives me mad because I can't remeber, I just can't.

Anywho, I'm done with my rambling. Take care.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Deployment Update: The Moron Chronicles

Alright, I flew here to Tampa Tuesday night. I went from 16-degree weather, snow and ice, to hot and humid in less than three hours.

Tuesday was hell. I woke to find that my inner moron had reached new heights of stupidity. That's what I get for making assumptions and not reading my checklist the whole way through.

Anywho. Got to Tampa, checked in at MacDill Inn. Wednesday: began inprocessing CENTCOM, got a rental car (PT Cruiser, wheeeee), and went to see my aunt Esther. Got lost coming back to base and ended up on the other side of the Hillsborough River. Somehow made my way back. Today: Got lost trying to find CENTCOM and was half-hour late. Got booted out of the Inn because they no longer have room for me. Got released at noon. Checked into a room with a king size bed and complimentary drinks. Cannot say where at. *HAPPY* Went to see Esther again and chowed on Chinese.

Tomorrow: More inprocessing. Then I'm off to spend the weekend at Esther's and see my Uncle Junior. My parents will be here on Monday, hopefully with my sister in tow, if she's still mad at her boyfriend, though I sincerely hope that won't be her reason for coming. That would suck. They're shooting to get me off to Qatar on the [date blocked], hopefully with a group so that my dumbass isn't left without adult supervision for more than five minutes. *sigh*

I miss my kitties. And I miss Jed.

Friday, January 5, 2007

The first of many.

Hi. This is my blog. This is the beginning. I have another blog. On MySpace. But this is the first post on this blog. So this is special.

I'll be in Florida on the 16th for my "deployment". Check back for updates. I'll figure out how to put picture on here. 'Bye.