(I <3 Laggin, Monica, and Terin.)
Today I saw the following status update on a friend's Facebook profile: "WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA Press 1 for English. Press 2 to disconnect, until you learn to speak English. And remember only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, JESUS CHRIST and the AMERICAN SOLIDER. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom. If you agree... copy and paste in your status"
Nothing against this friend, whom I've known for almost six years and like a lot, but I strongly disagree with this, and I am personally offended. My maternal grandmother lives on US soil. She was born a US citizen. And she does not speak a lick of English. And no one can make her, unless they wanna fly to Puerto Rico and drive up the mountainside she lives on and teach an 80-something-year-old lady a second language. By all mean, then, be my guest.
This continent was discovered in the very early years of the second millennium by the Vikings, who did not speak English. The indigenous population that was here before the arrival of the white man did not speak English. Cristobal Colon (known to Americans as Christopher Columbus) did not speak English, that I'm aware of. More than two-thirds of the continental US was once owned by Spain. The first settlers in America, period, were the Spaniards.
And the United States of America does NOT have an official language. In 1917, when the Jones Act granted US citizenship to all Puerto Ricans, no one ran to each and every Puerto Rican to check whether or not they spoke English.
Until further notice, my Facebook status updates will be in Spanish.