As we speak, my body reabsorbs that which is not viable, that fading spark of life that had been my one hope, my one chance at motherhood. I will never know what it is to bear a child in my womb. I will never hold it in my arms, never feel a mother's love.
No, that last part is wrong, for I knew it briefly. From the moment I saw that plus sign, I loved that tiny spark of life with every fiber of my being. Unplanned as it was, I was so grateful for the chance...a chance that will never be.
I only write this to get it all out at once. I do not seek sympathy or pity. I do not relish explaining this over and over. I'm ripping off the scab all at once. I do not wish to discuss this. I do not crave consolation. I just want to get on with my life...and forget as quickly as possible.
That is all.
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1 comment:
That sucks.
But I can say from experience that when the powers that be deem it, it will happen again. And this was but a glance, a mind set if you will, of what could be.
Grieve now for what you lost but know that something amazing will come.
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