Monday, November 29, 2010

Pollo guisado, arroz blanco, y habichuelas.

Oh, sorry. That's stewed chicken, white rice, and beans.

Pollo guisado (stewed chicken):
Pack of chicken drumsticks.
8 oz can of tomato sauce.
1 tbsp of Sofrito. (A Goya product that can be found in the "ethnic" section of your grocery store.)
Adobo. (Another Goya product.)
One packet of Sazon. (Goya.)
1 tbsp of olive oil.
3 or 4 medium potatoes.
Bay leaf.
Chicken flavored bouillon cube, one.
Chicken broth.
Two cloves of garlic, minced.

In a bowl, season the drumsticks with the adobo. Peel and cut up the potatoes.

In a large pot over high heat, combine all of the ingredients. Make sure you put enough water/chicken broth to cover the chicken. Boil covered until the potatoes are tender and the internal temp of the chicken is 165 degrees.

Arroz blanco (white rice):
3 cups of rice.
3.5 cups of water.
1 tbsp of vegetable or canola oil.
1 tsp of salt.

Combine in a rice cooker. Let the cooker do it's thing. If you're using crazy rice, like jasmine rice, I suggest 1.5 c water for each cup of rice.

Habichuelas (beans):
One can of pinto beans.
The other half-can of tomato sauce.
1 tbsp of sofrito.
1 tbsp of olive oil.
Two minced garlic cloves.
1 tsp of adobo.
One packet of sazon.
16 green olives.
1 tbsp of the juice from the olives.

Combine all of the above in a medium sauce pan over high heat. Once the skin of the beans splits, you can remove from heat.

None of this is copyrighted, trademarked, registered, what have you. I grew up on this stuff, my mom taught me how to make it all, I don't follow any of those measurements to a T. I've made it all so many times that I just throw stuff in and manage to get it all right. Good luck, and good eating.


Cream cheese stuffed chicken.

Prep time: 15 minutes.
Cook time: 45 minutes.

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1 8-oz container soft cream cheese spread
4 green onions, thinly sliced
4 bacon slices

Preheat oven to 375 degrees Fahrenheit. Coat a rectangular 2-qt baking dish with nonstick spray; set aside. (I used my Pampered Chef (r) Deep Covered Baker.) Place each chicken breast between two pieces of plastic wrap. Using the flat side of a meat mallet, pound chicken lightly to 1/4-inch thick. Remove plastic wrap.

In a small bowl combine cream cheese and green onions. Spread on each chicken breast, leaving a 1/2-inch border at the edges. Roll up from one short side, and wrap with 1 bacon slice; secure with wooden toothpicks, if needed. Repeat with remaining breasts.

Place chicken rolls, seam side down, in baking dish. Bake 45 minutes or until chicken is no longer pink. (165 degrees Fahrenheit internal temperature.)

Serves 4. (c) Try-Food International.

I served this with rigatoni noodles in a scampi garlic sauce.

Box of rigatoni noodles.
Packet of scampi seasoning; can be found in the seafood section at the grocery store.
Stick of butter/margarine.
Olive oil.
Two garlic gloves, minced or diced.

Boil noodles per box directions.

In a small saucepan, melt butter and olive oil together. Add the garlic. Stir together over medium heat for a few minutes, then add 2 tbsp of the scampi seasoning. Stir well.

Drain the noodles, and place them in a bowl. Pour the sauce over the noodles and mix it well. If you're feeling frisky, throw some grated Parmesan on top.


Saturday, November 27, 2010

Blogging from my Samsung Captivate.

I've waited my whole life for this phone. Srsly. I can use it as a nook or a Kindle!! Do you understand what this means to me as a bibliophile?!?!

Is this what heaven feels like??
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happeh Thanksgiving, mates.

Always am I thankful to the Goddess for my loving family, my few but wonderful friends, my good health, three great jobs, fun co-workers, and the opportunity to serve my country and see the world. Blessed be, and a lovely weekend to you all.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

And as for those bloody body scanners...

If there's a long line of people waiting to be patted down to protest the body scanner and hold up the lines for security to send a message to TSA, I plan on cutting in front of all of them to waltz through a scanner. I'm sorry, but I have a flight to catch, and if that means baring it all for TSA to prove that I do not have nefarious plans to bring down the plane, then somehow I'll find the will to press on.


'Cause you're hot, then you're cold...

San Antonio, Texas
80 degrees and sunny.

Rural lair of the Dread Pirate
59 degrees and rainy.

I'm ready to go home, I'm just not ready to leave this weather. Sad panda am I.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Del Carmen.

3/4 oz Strawberry Vodka.
1/2 oz Vanilla Vodka.
Lemon zest on the rim of the glass.
Topped with Prosecco champagne.
Add a lemon twist and a strawberry garnish.

This is my drink. It was made for me, and named for me (middle name). I love it.

Deer Hunter vs Four Horsemen.

No, this is not about an apocalyptic battle. Well...I take that back. It is, but it's not what you think.

Once upon a time, there was a show on the Travel Channel called Man Vs Food. The host of this show, Adam Richman, went to San Antonio to a restaurant called Chunky's to eat a burger called the Four Horsemen. It is so named because of the four peppers that make an appearance in this burger: jalapenos, habaneros, serranos, and the elusive Ghost Pepper, or Bhut Jolokia. It is the hottest pepper in the world, and makes grown men cry.

Once upon a time, Deer Hunter watched this episode and said, "I will eat that burger."

How convenient, then, that work should bring us here to Texas. We departed our hotel Friday night, not knowing how the night would end. Deer Hunter did come prepared, though.

Upon ordering, you must sign a waiver stating that you relieve Chunky's of all liability and that you understand the risks of consuming this monstrosity from hell. If you decided to partake of the Challenge, your waitress will inform you of the rules.

  1. You have twenty-five minutes to finish of the burger.
  2. You will not drench the burger in ketchup.
  3. You will not drink milk.
  4. There are no bathroom breaks.
  5. Once you have finished the burger, you are allowed one last sip of your beverage before starting a five-minute waiting period when you cannot eat or drink anything else.
  6. There is a $10 cleaning fee if you regurgitate anywhere other than the bucket that is provided.
Deer Hunger (and Parogi), prior to eating:

The challenge:

The aftermath:

He got halfway through, but bear this in mind: the waitress informed us that the burger consumed by our friend contained many more peppers than did the burger consumed by Adam Richman. And so I say unto you, the Deer Hunter is a BAMF, and Adam Richman is a pussy.

The End.

It wasn't as bad I thought it would be.

The cast: Deer Hunter, Parogi, and Ears (apparently this is what her son calls her). Our first night in San Antonio was spent having dinner on the River Walk. I went there once when I was in basic training but, like many of my BMT adventures, I did not remember it. Based on the praises of passerby, we decided to eat at an odd hole-in-the-wall-seeming restaurant called Delores Del Rio. It featured tasty yet overpriced Italian food, a jazz musician, and a belly dancer. The belly dancer didn't come out until much later.

We sat down and proceeded to order our drinks. I obtained for myself a carafe of white wine and refused to use the glass that was provided.

Deer Hunger and Parogi, being manly men, ordered beer. Ears is finicky when it comes wine, and the waitress, a middle-aged blond woman, recommended the house wine. The house wine was stored in a very large jug and was two-thirds full, so Ears assumed it had been open for a while and may have obtained a vinegary taste as a result. She said she would try a taste, though.

What the waitress brought was not a taste; it was half a glass. Ears took a sip, and without thinking said in suprise, "Oh, it's not as bad as I thought it would be!"

Let me tell you, hell froze over. The immediate surrounding area of our table became as frigid as Fairbanks in January. In that waitress's eyes, Ears was the dirt beneath her feet. We spent the rest of the night giving her a hard time, and she spent the rest of the night sucking up to the waitress.

At one point, Ears got up to go use the bathroom. When she came back, she said, "The belly dancer is back there, and she's fat!" Oh dear. Parogi became curious, and he went to use the bathroom too. He confirmed the fatness upon his return. Finally, I get up to use the bathroom. What I see is an older lady dressed in a quirky fashion in jeans and a t-shirt, just hanging out in the kitchen. I knew she wasn't the belly dancer.

When the belly dancer finally did show up, she was an okay-looking girl in her late twenties, early thirties. She didn't do anything impressive, but according to the waitress she teaches a belly dance class. I found this hard to believe, because while she wasn't fat she didn't have the muscular build in the middle of her body that most belly dancers have.

We found out later that the old lady in the back is the owner, the middle-aged waitress is her daughter (hence being personally offended by Ears), and the younger belly dancer is the owner's girlfriend. Hm.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Friday Night Giggles and Downers.

Just got back from devouring delicious Thai cuisine, and I can't stop laughing over this stuff.

What are you top five crime scene albums?

The five most wildly illegal court rulings in movie history.

Five things nobody tells you about quitting drinking,

This upsets me. And is the reason why I don't like to discuss my spirituality.

Three reasons the Ground Zero Mosque debate makes no sense. Btw, what's been going on with that?? I'm so out of the loop...

Five things you won't believe aren't in the Bible. Also, I'm an antichrist. Don't tell Marguerite Perrin.

Six things from history everyone pictured wrong. Hopefully you can wrap your head around the fact that Jesus, if he existed, wasn't white.

Five fictional stories you were taught in history class. Ha.

The five most inspiring things ever accomplished (while drunk). Fiance, don't get any ideas...

Why Eminem needs to find something new to rap about. It's truuuuue.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

A quote.

"My message to you is: Be courageous! I have lived a long time. I have seen history repeat itself again and again. I have seen many depressions in business. Always America has come out stronger and more prosperous. Be as brave as your fathers before you. Have faith! Go forward." - - Thomas Edison.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

You learn something new every day.

One morning, I texted Canuck to see if he wanted to join the Cool Kids for coffee. He replied back:
I'm off today doing manual labor at home. You too can have a day off if you cheat on the PT test like me }=D
I was intrigued, to say the least. I asked him to teach I've failed my last two tests.
First lesson: cut across the football field when running the track; this will cut your time in half =P
...riiiight. Well...I am kinda small. So maybe the testers won't notice me doing that?
Second PT lesson: have them treat the measuring tape as if it was a tourniquet =P 27-inch waist is good to go, I think. But wait...there are four components that make up the Air Force physical training test. You've covered the aerobic (running) component, the abdominal circumference (waist) component...but what about the push-ups and sit-ups?

" can't really cheat on those."

But those were the ones I failed last time. Sigh. Guess I'll have to pass it the old-fashioned working out. Shit.

You know what really grinds my gears?

Holding out your left hand to demand A, while at the same time holding out your right hand to demand B.

Read this article about the three Iowan judges who have been thrown out by the people over same-sex marriage. This sentence in the fifth paragraph really pisses me off:

The outcome marks the end of a showdown in the state that was funded by several million dollars from mostly out-of-state groups opposed to the same-sex marriage ruling.

But why, Davi? What does this piss you off? I'm all for a smaller federal government. A central government with too much power inevitably becomes corrupt over time. All these Republicans, Tea Partiers, they want to protect the states' rights, correct? They want issues like the legalization of abortion and same-sex marriage to be determined at the state level, as opposed to the federal level, amirite? Alright then. I'm down with that.

So, understand yet why that statement pisses me off? If you are a resident of Delaware, who the hell are you to nudge a Maryland resident in the shoulder and say, "Hey, you're doing things wrong in your state, so I'm gonna throw some cash that way to change things." Um, Mr Delaware Resident, if you don't like how they run things in Maryland, I suggest you keep your happy ass in The First State. (I'm not hating on Delaware, btw; that little speck on the map holds a special place in my heart.)

Are we seeing yet the hypocrisy? Yes, let the states decide these matter, but if someone in another state disagrees with the outcome, it's okay to come trudging in my front yard to persuade me to do things your way? I don't think so, pal. Get the fuck off my lawn, thx.

I believe that when it comes to local elections, elections for senators and representatives and local justices and governors and what have you, that it is unethical to accept campaign funds from out of state. I believe it is unethical for these out-of-state groups to try to influence these local elections.

Here's the problem I've been noticing for a year now. All these folks hooping and hollering for smaller government? They're never happy with what they have. People hold out one hand begging for smaller government, while holding out their other hand yelling at Capitol Hill to fix all their problems. As I said to MacGyver, "These people don't want smaller government! They say the do; they think they do. But they'll always turn to the federal government to fix all their problems."

I struggle daily to remain nonpartisan. I voted for Mark Kirk, a Republican, and he's now going to be my Senator. I voted for Jerry Costello, a Democrat, and he's going to continue as my House Representative. But I look at the increasingly red map of our country, and I am nervous as hell. I'm nervous about all these fringe politicians who are going to be even less likely to reach across the aisle for a compromise. (Mitch McConnell even said himself that the Republicans should NOT compromise!) I foresee a time after the New Year that will be similar to what occurred after the midterms elections in 1994.

History always repeats itself; it doesn't mean we have to repeat our mistakes. I wish the best of luck to our potential new House Speaker, John Boehner; I hope Senator Harry Reid wakes up and hears the voices of his constituents; and I pray to the Goddess that our President takes a step, assesses the situation, and realizes that if he wants to get anything done, if he wants to get our country back on track, he needs to stop siding so much with the Democrats and do all that he can to unite our partisan Representatives and Senators.